[The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>
Thu, Jul 8, 2010 at 3:56 PM
To: [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] <[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com>
[Custodial Dad]:
Hope all is well. As my attorney has clarified with yours, I ask [daughter] about her life as it relates to her. If there is incidental mention of your children on occasion, it is with respect of the relationship [daughter] expresses with them. That’s all.
You have provided me with no schedule of her daily routine or her friends and social experiences and interactions with family or friends. She mentions Alana and that Alana’s mom drives her in her vehicle, yet you stated that only you and [spelled incorrectly Step Mother] would be involved in that capacity.
Who is involved in [daughter]’s life and in her care, including transport? Do you think I should know who drives our daughter to and from activities? I would like to understand so I can ask the details which you think are appropriate for me to know. Kindly respond.
Also, to what steps are you referring when you stated your interpretation of my conversations with [daughter]? Does that have anything to do with my phone time with [daughter]? I would like an opportunity to understand your parenting decisions as her custodial parent, [Custodial Dad].
1. Parenting Counseling: Thanks for your efforts. Please go ahead and set up counseling sessions with Dr.[home town therapist] and inform me of the schedule options for parenting counseling via certified mail with return receipt to you so we have a clear tracking of the notice to me. Please also forward this notice to my attorney via certified mail at the same time you notify me. Please allow sufficient time for me to arrange my schedule for counseling sessions. Thanks again.
My offer: As the counseling at St. X’s Church is free and I understand that you are a member there, I suggest that we utilize that service. Please let me know.
2. In trying to understand your email, I would appreciate if you could define your understanding of [daughter]’s needs for family life. Is it your understanding that Mom’s contact is secondary at this point based on the fact that you just got custody? I would like to support what you think is best for [daughter] at this time, but I don’t quite understand your desires of her shared time with her family. Please help me to understand.
3. Transition Completed? Again, would appreciate help understanding your email about [daughter]’s transition to your home. How did you determine what to do to transition her and what did you do to evaluate if her transition was successful? What were the expected problems you anticipated based on your views of [daughter]’s learned attitudes and alienation from you? Was she able to be close with you emotionally or is that a struggle for her? I am concerned and interested to know how you have been able to transition her to a new home, school, social network without any interim contact with the world she was removed from after eight years with Mom. Please help me to understand how we know [daughter] is transitioned. What do you want my role to be in her life at this time? I am happy to help facilitate your parenting decisions so they meet [daughter]’s needs.
4. Medical records share please: Of course I have the contact information for the providers as you have provided. But I am asking your cooperation as a parent who has custody of our child. Logically, I have asked for your help to get the records of [daughter]’s medical, dental and psychological care as you are in direct contact with those providers. I am sure you have gotten copies of her records for mediation and court. Please do not refuse to help me get access to those records. Please copy your most updated records for me to have our daughter’s files also. I will pay your copy fees as I’m sure the library offers 10-15cent cost per page. Please help me, [Custodial Dad]. I really would like to have [daughter]’s records. Please allow me to have copies of your records of [daughter]’s care as detailed.
Thanks.
Kind Regards,
[The Ex] [last name]
Dad refuses - Mom requests again Re: Medical Card for [daughter], please.
1 message
[The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>
Thu, Jul 8, 2010 at 4:10 PM
To: [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] <[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com>
[Custodial Dad]:
I understand from your message that you will not send a copy of her insurance card,
though you could have sent this important document in any of the certified letters you have managed to send to me in the last four months.
At least let me know via email the carrier and the card number so I can have this for [daughter]’s visit.
Is there anything to hide? It is very straight- forward.
Do you not want me to know of the source and coverage information of [daughter]’s medical insurance?
In fact, I believe you will have to share that information with me when we set up child support payments between us.
This refusal is interesting.
Please reconsider, [Custodial Dad]. It’s for [daughter]’s care as she is here in [other state].
Kindly,
[The Ex] [last name]
From: [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] <[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com>
To: [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] <[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com>
Cc: [The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>
Sent: Fri, July 2, 2010 7:47:05 PM
Subject: Re: Medical Card for [daughter], please.
Actually I should say, no I will not send you ANOTHER medical card for [daughter].
I would also suggest you re-read the multitude of emails and letters sent addressing these very issues that we keep addressing over and over again.
[Custodial Dad]
On Jul 2, 2010, at 7:19 PM, [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] wrote:
[The Ex]:
No, I will not send her medical card. In the event of an emergency, please take her to the nearest facility and have them send a bill. I will forward it to my insurance carrier.
According to the order, you may NOT take [daughter] to any provider except in an emergency.
Thanks again;
[Custodial Dad]
On Jul 2, 2010, at 6:26 PM, [The Ex] [last name] wrote:
[Custodial Dad],
Please send [daughter]’s medical card(s) for her stay with me this summer.
Please send to:
[other state address] X, [town in other state], [other state] [zip]
Thanks.
[The Ex] [last name]
From: [Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name] <[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com>
To: [The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>; [The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>; [The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>; [The Ex] [last name] <[the ex email]@[email].com>
Sent: Mon, June 28, 2010 3:42:37 PM
Subject: June Update: Requests for Responses
CERTIFIED MAIL RETURN RECEIPT
ELECTRONIC MAIL
[The Ex] [last name]
[street address in other state] [third state] Road
[town in other state], [other state] [zip]
Dear [The Ex]:
I am still awaiting a response to the many, many unanswered questions. I have attached the last two letters that went unanswered.
There are two pressing issues that need to be resolved ASAP:
1. I do NOT have an accurate social security number for [daughter]. I have asked repeatedly for a copy of her card for my records/ to update [insurance company] as they require a fax to update their records and the number so I may obtain a card for [daughter]. I was able to utilize the copy of the birth certificate that was in her [school] folder until the certified copy came in.
2. It has been brought to my attention through several verifiable sources that you do NOT reside at the [street in other state] home. Unless you provide me with an accurate and verifiable address, [daughter] will NOT be traveling to [other state] until this has been cleared up. I have given you ample notice and if you refuse to comply then I will have no choice other than to restrict your visitation with [daughter]. Further, we need to finalize the visitation schedule in regards to drop off, pick up and flight information which should have been finalized months ago per the order which specifies April 15. As this is the first of hopefully many vacations, I am allowing this to drag out however next year I will demand a formal and finalized plan by the date given.
As for [daughter]’s update:
A. School and Summer Camp:
1. She had a fantastic end of school and will be going to third grade at [home town] Intermediate Elementary along with her classmates. She has already toured the school and has met the principal and vice principal socially last summer. She is very excited to be going to the third grade. She starts school the last week in August and will be in uniform per the [home town] School District Requirements. [daughter] mentioned that you wanted to purchase some items for her. If that is the case, please visit this website: http://www.[newspaper in home state].com/assets/pdf/PR435515.PDF to confirm what is and is not acceptable.
2. Summer Camp: She had a fantastic week of summer camp and is already making friends. I believe she already knows several girls in her group from school and from her other siblings. She is doing an excellent job of communicating what is going on there and I think I will let her fill you in on the details of camp herself.
B. Medical/Dental: She has been very diligent with maintaining her palate extender and her speech is about 80 - 90% back to normal. She is a model patient for [orthodontist]. Her sessions with Dr. [home town therapist] are going well. We are all amazed at how wonderful her adjustment has been. He has reserved a session prior to her departure and upon her arrival home to ensure that progress is not lost during her vacation and time with you.
C. [daughter]’s Mailings: [daughter] has had several letters returned to us as address unknown or recipient unknown. I know that in my last message I requested an updated mailing address and also requested that you acknowledge her mailings to [daughter] directly. It is important for [daughter] to know that you are receiving the items she is sending to you. She is very gracious to say thank you to the sticker mailings and it would only be polite to return the favor to her. I am sure to give [daughter] her mailing’s that are returned so that she may hand deliver them to you directly.
D. Communication: [daughter] is still asking to [webcam software] with you. I have offered a multitude of times and find it hard to imagine that you do not want face to face interaction with [daughter]. I am again, throwing that out there in case you have somehow changed your mind. To remind you, there are several web cafes in the [town in other state] area that able to allow you a chance to [webcam software] with [daughter] for low cost, if you no longer have access to a computer.
Again, you really need to comply and respond to my requests for information. You are barely acknowledging anything being said to you however, [daughter] mentions you are directly mentioning certain things to her that should be directed through me. I am attempting to co-parent with you, despite the order, however you are making this beyond difficult. Please take a few moments to respond to the messages, letters and text messages sent to you.
Take good care;
[Custodial Dad] [last name]
[Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name]
[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com
[Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name]
[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com
[Custodial Dad] and [Step Mother] [last name]
[Custodial Dad’s home email]@[email].com
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